Sunday, March 26, 2006

Cats in the Dog House

The harmony in the Cree household is slightly upset at the moment. Gorgeous is not happy. One of the boys is in big trouble. I think the only thing keeping one of them from some serious unpleasantness is that we have no idea who is responsible.

Low Rider is in trouble enough already. Because of him, the boys are banished to a back bedroom nearly every night. He had sort of a fit when we set the clocks back to standard time last fall. Now every morning at 0330 he decides that its time to get up. And he’s smart about it. He makes quick passes across the bed to make sure everyone’s awake. But he takes special care to run across our legs. You see he has precisely calculated the time-to-reach-radius of the average undercover groggy adult on our end of the block and he never crosses that boundary. Ever.

Then its time for a fun game of chase the black cat in the dark when you are half asleep without your contacts in. That game is sooo much fun that we usually resort to bribing him (and Fat Boy too while we’re at it) with food to get him locked in the back bedroom, which of course only serves to reinforce Low Rider’s annoying behavior. The trouble is Low Rider is smart.

Fat Boy on the other hand is, well, not so bright. Whenever he got up before the alarm, I always found him within arm’s reach and could scruff him and drag him off to a penalty box somewhere. He never quite figured out that he’s much faster than I am and that if he stayed out of reach I’d probably never catch him. I got him trained to never bother us until the alarm went off. And it was a good system.

Low Rider played by that system as well up until we changed the clocks last fall, which brings us back to our current troubles.

Someone has taken to peeing right outside the litter box. Fortunately Gorgeous keeps a little rubber backed throw rug right there to catch the bulk of the litter the boys drag out of the pan, so it hasn’t soaked into the carpeting yet. And it’s only happened three times so far. Even so, “Houston, we have a problem,” if you know what I mean.

I think I’ve pretty much convinced Gorgeous that it isn’t me at this point. I mean I’m a guy. I can see how the boys might miss from time to time. Aiming can be a challenge at times even with thumbs. But I’m keeping my peace on this one because three times in a row is beginning to look less like an accident. Besides, I’m not ready to take that kind of heat.

Anyway, if Gorgeous ever figures out which is the responsible party, things could get pretty ugly for him. She’s got no patience for bad aim.

Here’s a shot of the boys. It might help you pray for them…

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